The preface of my forthcoming book, Signs of Infinity: Keys to Awaken the Soul, illustrates a true personal story - one in which an eastern mystic teacher called me out of the blue from India, a person I had neither met nor heard of. He urged me to write this very book and he reminded me of my purpose and mission. In the midst of our exchange, I exclaimed to him, "I want my destiny!"
I believe that above all else I came to this planet in this particular incarnation to fulfill my destiny; this impulse has always been a major, driving impulse in my life. And yet I see that there have been obscurations present that hindered the realization of what exactly my destiny might be as well as life-altering obstacles and even death defying experiences that blocked that very path.
I found that some of these obstacles were reinforced by me after things had gotten hairy or gone woefully wrong, while others were inflicted upon my life by others as well as exterior conditions that at the time seemed well outside of my control. I also noticed that my fear of the unknown set up blockades, that my ideas around being in control created great barriers to realizing my destiny.
Those blockages enforced by the frightened, lower mind of the personality include the old tapes, ancient imprints of the past, ones that seem so imperishable and bullet proof, the ones that repeatedly say,
Your presence does not matter.
The work you do is not enough.
The person you are is insufficient.
Your dreams are unrealistic.
Your hopes are frivolous and will never be realized.
Your flaws will hold you back.
Your life and circumstances are meaningless.
Your inner resolve will not hold center.
You are going to give up or die before you realize your purpose.
Regardless of these negative thought imprints, deep down I knew better. I knew that that these statements were just a false story that was being perpetrated by fear or hopelessness. I felt that this lifetime could be my chance to wake up and break free from bondage that had kept me enslaved to useless and damaging programming.
I kept true to myself and my path, asking the heavenly realms and most especially my individual Soul Self for help, specifically in penetrating any impediments that might stop me from gaining personal meaning in this lifetime.
To access this kind of help, simply concede that you cannot control every single circumstance or event in your life, especially those that are inflicted upon you from outside forces, including the placements of the very stars you were born under.
I learned that you aren't meant to do everything by yourself. I discovered that help from the higher realms is always available.
The key is to tune into your Soul Self, to appeal to the higher realms by making your requests in the form of questions. For example:
Will you keep my faith alive?
Will you guide me on the path and open the inner and outer doorways?
Will you make my destiny come to life and direct me toward my highest purpose?
Will you give me the strength to persevere through this dark night and offer me the determination to break through my obstacles?
Will you lead me into my destiny, no matter how intangible it may seem to others?
Will you allow my realized destiny to help others?
Make a list of your questions to determine what your heart needs most right now and make an appeal.
Many people ask me to identify their purpose, expressing that despite working a service-oriented job or being a parent or having many emotional connections, it seems they fear destiny is escaping them, that there is no real purpose to their lives. I have witnessed that this fear causes them much pain, extreme hopelessness and suffering, for they truly feel defeated, as if the point of their lives were purposeless. Without meaning, they ask, what good is living?
Listen, sometimes the only control you have is deciding how to bring your awareness to your situation, for the act of being aware is the most powerful of all actions. Thus, awareness itself becomes a germinating seed of power and meaning. In addition, bring your willingness to change and your courageous heart to weather your tenable and risky circumstances, for both actions will fuel the very purpose of your life.
You are given human will for a reason, and you must exercise personal will to push through any obstacle that would stop you from living your life's mission. For what good is an obstacle if it was given for only self-defeating reasons that would prevent you from reaching your highest potential, stop you from achieving power and happiness, divert you from healing or kill your spirit and bring you to your knees so that you could never get up again?
What if obstacles were presented to be a vehicle to bring you to your depths, to eventually magnetize you toward your ascension and healing?
What if blocks meant you needed to access a road less traveled? What if the biggest threat to personal meaning meant you were supposed to master a gift and commandeer an inner vehicle that would surely give you the impulse to ride through your darkest night?
What if your personal breakthrough meant it could make a difference in someone else's life?
The guidance is to contemplate conditions that are holding you back, to claim your gifts and understand that at times the holy forces above are securing you in place for very particular reasons that may be outside of your immediate knowledge but are nonetheless important for your eventual becoming.
This is the part where you get that the Soul itself is always being influenced by The Divine, that the forces of destiny are being called into play. This is when the Soul needs to surrender to that energetic force and not work against it. But there is surrender and there is willful, cooperative, co-creative action, and it is not always easy to discern whether to exercise one principle over the other.
Remember, everything under heaven has its polar opposite, so that where there is a barricade there must be an opening. Where there is a blackened, dead end there is conversely a new beginning, a fresh, unencumbered bright light.
In Beyonce's song, I Was Here, she delivers on a purpose that surely she was born to achieve:
I wanna leave my footprints on the sands of time
Know there was something that, meant something that I left behind
When I leave this world, I'll leave no regrets
Leave something to remember, so they won't forget
I was here
I lived, I loved
I was here
I did, I've done everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
Let me say I have some regrets; in the past I coulda woulda shoulda done several things most significantly better, more graciously, less harshly, exceedingly more compassionately and with much more awareness. So I don't really fully embrace the sentiment of "living without regrets," revealing that in my immature, asleep past I made mistakes; I said and did things that in fact hurt certain others' feelings or perhaps more.
Of course, in an awakened life, there are always past regrets. And yes, when I came to, I felt sorrow for causing another's suffering, for illumined "regret" encompasses that very real effect.
Unlike Beyonce's song, I don't need "to do everything" I think my lower mind "has wanted to do," but I still have the impulse to initiate anything my higher mind wants my Soul to accomplish for the benefit of others and to feed my own creative fire.
I don't need to "leave a mark" and embellish my footprints "in the sands of time." I just hope to become the Me that my Destiny wants me to Be.
This is my immediate mission:
To accomplish what I set out to do at the beginning of my tiny life. To Live. To Love.
To exercise my mission so that it not only serve my Soul but in the most miraculous of beatitudes, do or say something that would make a difference in someone else's life.
I realize my destiny points to many intangibles ~ things that are immaterial but are of immense value to me:
To be inspired and to be an inspiring person
To see beauty in the world and the cosmos
To connect my heart to people, animals and all beings in the natural world
To feel a Supreme connection to The Divine and upper pantheons
To de~condition my heart against any circumstance that prevents me from being loving and compassionate
To realize my highest awareness and dissolve any veil that prevents it
To experience joy and laughter and spread it whenever possible
To gain a unique personal philosophy, a purposeful Way to The Divine that I can share
To keep my inner Witness alive
To keep finding a reason to sing
To keep my heart open, even in the rages of hell
What is your intangible mission? Make a list now and see how it resonates within your Soul.
Sometimes I have found that this Destiny of mine has a mind of its own. And finally I trust that.
Awakening people ~ you must believe that your original impulse to come to this planet ~ to be here ~ was not a mistake but a determined effort to do one thing: To become your own accomplishment. And if that in turn serves others, how much better could it get?
And that, my illumined friends, would be enough. It would be plenty. And the biggest glory of all is to realize that your "mission accomplished" will have assisted others on their practically impossible paths to live, love, seek depth and touch it and bring it on home into the realm of possibility.
Since I have not come to the end of my life I haven't lived out my full destiny as of yet, but I see that I am realizing some of it. I see that the more conscious I remain, the more my destiny has evolved to come exceptionally clear and more directed.
Whatever you do in the world, seek to find meaning and you cannot go wrong. Seek to believe that you were born with the will to penetrate any veil that blocks your awareness. Seek to understand when to surrender to your deepest potential. Ask for guidance. And most of all, trust that your Soul is keeping your dreams alive. Trust that you have never been forgotten, for The Divine keeps you forever in its heart.
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Paula Dianne Upton's mystical book, Signs of Infinity is available on Createspace and Amazon. Sign up for the newsletter, Instagram, Facebook and Pinterest from the homepage.